October 26, 2010

On the Origin of

People come up to me all the time and ask, "Hey, Baby Expert, how did you become a baby expert? You reek of awesomeness!" Yes, I do.

Alright, so maybe this has only occurred in my dreams and has never happened in real life before. However, I know you've spent many a sleepless night pondering over this very question!

The fact of the matter is, I've got a plethora of time on my hands when I'm at work. I have around 2-4 hours of down time a day in which I can bury the ol' noggin in baby trivia. One of my favorite sites I like to visit is www.BabyCenter.com. I highly recommend this site for anyone that's thinking about getting pregnant, is pregnant, or has a child.

What makes this site super cool is the fact that I started my own group on it. That's right, I am the founding president of the Men's Support Group. This, in and of itself, should be reason enough for you to visit the site. Now, whenever I need to send out a job resume, I can add that to my list of accomplishments. In fact, I'm thinking of petitioning it to become a historic landmark (or in this case, bookmark), a place you need to visit whenever you go on the Internet.

What's even cooler is that my group has only one member, yours truly. It's that elite of a club. I'm not sure why no one has joined my group. Perhaps people are intimidated by my credentials. I mean, it's not every day that you're in the presence of a bona fide baby expert. 


But should I be punished for this fact? Should I be labeled an outcast? You try and bring a little light to this world, and what do people do? They give you the cold shoulder. I feel your pain, baby Jesus. And it hurts. It hurts.

To my unborn, lucky charm baby ...  It's a cruel, cruel world out there.

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