Heartbreaker

Light the fire and toss in the onsies! Shirts proclaiming, “Daddy’s Little Heartbreaker,” might be more applicable for our baby. Caitlyn has turned against her master yet again.

On Saturday, I let the wife have the night off so she could take a break and I could spend some alone time with the baby. The entire time Jessie was gone, Caitlyn cried almost non-stop. For over 2 hours, she didn’t want to feed or have anything to do with me. Not until Mommy came home and she was safe in her arms did Caitlyn finally calm down.

Her recent bizarre behavior has completely flummoxed me. One minute she likes me, the next minute, I’m a complete stranger. She’s got a love/hate relationship with me, and I don’t know what's bringing about this behavior. She sees me every day, I interact with her every day, so it seems odd that she would completely forget who I am at random, various times throughout the day.

It seems as if she's determining everything by how she’s feeling at that particular moment. If she’s in a happy and generous mood, she’ll let me hold her and feed her. If she’s in a cranky mood, forget about it. I should be happy and grateful with just that because Caitlyn won’t let other people hold her even when she's in a good mood.

I can see all her fans slowly fading away if she keeps this behavior up. After all, when people visit, they want to be able to hold and play with the baby. If Caitlyn's got a no-look, no-touch policy in place, what's the point of visiting? Thinking long term, this could spell trouble when we want to start dropping the baby off at the nanny’s or Grandma’s. No one is going to want to deal with a baby that cries nonstop or is wary of anyone besides Mommy.

I’ve tried to stop this behavior cold turkey by continuing to hold Caitlyn until she stops crying, but whenever the wife hears the baby’s persistent cries and screams, she always comes to her rescue. I personally think that’s just letting the baby know that crying will get her what she wants. But given how stubborn Caitlyn can be, I know she won’t stop and have to agree that letting her cry hours on end isn’t exactly the solution either.

Another complication that’s arisen is the fact that she doesn’t like sitting in her stroller any more. I don’t know what has brought this on either, but I’m guessing that it’s due to the fact that we’ve been using the baby carrier a lot more recently. She probably likes this better because it’s like being carried in our arms.

However, I don’t want her to get into this comfort zone where she expects to be held everywhere. We’re already holding her more than we should be at home. She needs to learn to sit in her stroller and be happy with that.

This past weekend, we take her to practice being out in public, and she starts a screaming fit in her stroller that gains her an audience from passersby, including several moms. The wife is obviously embarrassed as she picks up the baby and tries to shush her. Some people are just curious onlookers while others are giving her advice as to the cause of our baby’s tantrum and what the wife should do.

Don’t people know it’s rude to stare and that we don’t really want their advice at this particular moment in time? Mothers, especially, should know better than this. I’m sure every mother has experienced this kind of scenario before and probably wished they could just disappear.

Therefore, it would seem like common sense when they see another mother struggling with a crying baby that they turn a blind eye. But I guess common sense gets thrown out the window when there’s a great spectacle to be seen.

So yea, exactly when can we begin to actually enjoy our baby?

A Happy Ending

Looks like I’ll be putting a hold on burning all “Daddy’s Girl” themed clothes. I’ve managed to get my baby mojo back!

After rushing home after work yesterday, I changed into the wife’s nightie and for extra measure and luck, also put on a pair of her leggings that she had laying around. Never hurts to be extra prepared. The wife had gone out with the baby to buy some groceries, but when they came back at 5:30, I swooped in to pick up the baby and scurried to our bedroom, away from the wife.

Caitlyn was already in a fussy mood from sitting in the baby stroller, and a period of crying and screaming ensued for about 15 minutes. I began to fear that I might not be able to ever hold her again, but persistence paid off, and she finally began to tire and eventually fell asleep in my arms. Normally, I would have put her down in her crib, but I needed to use every minute of my time with Caitlyn to my advantage, and so continued to hold her while she slept.

At 6:30, the wife leaves to go to her mom’s house for dinner. With her presence and scent gone, I’m able to breathe a bit easier. Eventually, I decide to put Caitlyn back in her crib at 7:00 so she can get a good rest.

The wife calls later to check up on things and tells me to bring the baby to her mom’s house at 8:00. I balk at the idea because I planned on having her to myself for the evening. However, the wife said we needed to start having more people hold Caitlyn so she could get used to it. I’ve got a feeling that she’s trying to undermine my bonding time with my daughter, but I know that’s just paranoia setting in.

At 8:00, I begrudgingly wake Caitlyn up and carry her to the mother-in-law’s house, which is just down the street. Surprisingly, Caitlyn doesn’t even make a sound the entire time!  I think I might be slowly winning her back. Or maybe she’s still a bit out of it and doesn’t exactly know what’s going on.

As I go to eat dinner, Grandma comes and takes Caitlyn off to feed. So far so good. No cry or whimper coming from her mouth yet. But after finishing her meal, and then perhaps finally realizing who was holding her, Caitlyn begins her crying, and doesn’t stop until Grandma hands her off to me.

A few minutes of walking around with the baby and singing quietly, and I’ve got her calm again.  Grandma comes back for round 2, but gets KO’ed in a matter of minutes. I’m back in the driver’s seat again, working my magic, getting Caitlyn to calm back down. Jessie insists that her mom try again, but round 3 doesn’t go any better for her. I helpfully try suggesting that perhaps she try wearing some of Jessie’s clothes next time.

I’m in high spirits as we walk back home around 9:00. The rest of the night continues smoothly for us. I give Caitlyn a bath and a feeding at midnight before heading off to bed. I’ve managed to keep the wife’s contact with the baby to a bare minimum, and more importantly, got back on Caitlyn’s good side. Life doesn’t get much better than this.

Ain't no shame in my game.

Caitlyn doesn't like Daddy

The unthinkable has happened. Caitlyn has officially shut me out of her life. I might as well go burn all the “Daddy’s Girl,” onsies and bibs we have. She’s all Mommy’s girl now.

I didn’t really notice any change in her behavior until this past Sunday night while I was trying to put her to bed. As usual, she was crying and kicking up a storm as I tried unsuccessfully to get her to calm down. After hearing the baby cry long enough, the wife stepped in and the baby miraculously stopped crying when she held her.

After putting her down to sleep, the wife goes about her business again, but a few moments later, Caitlyn starts crying. I go back to pick her up to soothe, but once again, it’s only when Jessie’s holding her does she stop crying.

At the time, I was just thinking, “Hmm…the wife’s just a better soother than me,” and didn’t think any more of it.

Yesterday, after I come back from work, the wife tells me that her mom came over in the afternoon and the baby cried each time she tried to hold her. I didn’t put two and two together yet, thinking that perhaps our baby only liked the wife and me since we were her primary caretakers.

But later that night, when I put Caitlyn in her baby carrier for a walk outside, she just kept crying and crying. Something she doesn’t normally do whenever she’s in the carrier. We thought this was due to the fact that we had perhaps put her in the carrier too soon after feeding her.

However, even after taking her out and having me holding her, the crying continued. And it continued when we got back home. Until, of course, when I handed the baby to the wife. That’s when it slowly started to sink in. My baby only likes her mommy, not daddy! I was devastated. I felt like crying. And that’s when I went into panic mode.

The most obvious reason for this drastic shift must be from the fact that the wife stays home and bonds all day with the baby while I only get to see her at night. I looked online to see if people had any advice for situations like this. It comforted me a bit knowing that many people see this type of behavior in their babies too.

I knew the best way to reverse this behavior would be increasing the amount of time spent with Caitlyn. Reading a story, snapping some photos, and pinching her cheeks a few times each night wouldn’t cut it anymore. Sending the wife out of the house so the baby can’t see or smell her is also an option.

I read that it’s sometimes helpful to have your partner wear your shirt while she’s holding the baby. This way, she smells my scent too. A good idea, but not good enough.

Therefore, I took it to the next level by demanding the wife give me the shirt she was wearing so I could wear it. It was a lacy, fuchsia-colored, plunging v-neck nightie that would have made any cross dresser squeal with delight.

Somehow, I managed to squeeze myself into it and patiently waited for Caitlyn to wake up so I could feed her. The only problem was that it was nearing midnight now, and she didn’t seem to be waking up any time soon. Eventually, I had to admit defeat and head off to bed.

Even with that minor setback, my plan for winning Caitlyn back is still fully intact. Tonight, I'm breaking out my A-game, fuchsia-colored nightie and all!

 Mommy's girl lifting her head

 Mommy's girl smiling

 Mommy's girl playing with Harry Hippo

Car Seat Controversy

It appears we have someone posing as a resident car seat expert in our house. Unfortunately for her, she forgot who she was dealing with.

Jessie: I don’t think our baby likes your car seat. You should have listened to me when I said to buy the other one.
Me: What’s wrong with the car seat? Caitlyn seems to like it.
Jessie: It’s not slanted enough. The car seat almost seems upright.
Me: No, if it was upright, her head would be flopping around, which it’s not.
Jessie: You only want what you want!! You don’t care about the baby or her safety!!
Me: Actually, it’s because I care about our baby and her safety that I actually took the time to research and read about the different types and brands of car seat before picking the car seat that I did. That’s seems a tad bit more than just browsing through pictures, like a certain person I know did.
       In fact, the National Highway Traffic Safety Organization states that a car seat should be angled at 30-45 degrees. This is deemed the safest. Any more than that might allow a child’s body to slide toward the top of the seat during a crash, exposing the head to injury.

       Our Britax car seat is angled at 45 degrees. The most it can possibly recline to while still being safe. If you want a car seat that can be angled more than that, then you are the one that doesn’t care about our baby or her safety. So, the next time you start talking, know your facts first. Boo-yah! In your face! I win again! Apologize!
Jessie: ….sorry…..

Looks like 45 degrees to me

Finally putting the baby carrier to use

Hair gone wild!

'Trouble' is my middle name

Eating her flower

Caitlyn and Harry Hippo

 

Enjoying her weekly swim

The wife covering Caitlyn's cukoo

 

Face-timing with Grandparents

Working out the neck

 

All dressed up!

Pool Party!

On Friday, I saw a Youtube video of a baby swimming around in a bathtub with an inner tube that’s designed to go around the neck. It was one of the cutest and coolest things I’ve seen. So, of course I had to go get one for Caitlyn that very same day.

It reminded me of all the years of swimming I did when I was a kid in the community swimming league. It also reminded me that I need to start early with my child, otherwise she might turn out like the wife, who doesn’t know how to swim.

The only problem was that we have no bathtub in our apartment, only a shower. This led me to buy and drag home a very large, industrial-sized garbage can. And this in turn led Jessie to stare at me stupidly when I proudly showed her what I was going to have Caitlyn swimming in. I guess bringing home a garbage can for your daughter to swim in isn’t exactly a common thing to do.

Unfortunately, my plan was thwarted when the inner tube’s diameter was actually larger than the garbage can. The wife helpfully suggested I get an inflatable pool instead, which actually wasn’t a bad idea.

Therefore, I went back to the grocery store, returned the garbage can and picked up an inflatable pool. The only downside was that the inflatable pool was a bit on the shallow side. The reason I got the garbage can in the first place was so that it would be deep enough for Caitlyn to kick her feet around in. But there were no other containers that were wide enough to fit the inner tube, so inflatable pool it was.

When I came back home with my new toy and promptly began pumping air into the 4 feet wide pool, the wife had another stupefied look on her face. Apparently, when she told me to get an inflatable pool, she had something smaller, more apartment-friendly in mind. Sorry, bub. There was only one size.

I need take a moment right now to thank Jessie’s sister for having the foresight to design a bathroom big enough to fit my inflatable pool. Otherwise, seeing our baby frolic around happily in the pool wouldn’t have been possible.

Since the pool required a lot of water to fill up, I decided to be eco-conscious and re-use the water for my own bath. I tried to get the wife to jump on-board, but she balked at my idea. I told her this was how people back in the 1800’s used to do it. Family members would take turns using the same bath to conserve water. I even offered to let her go first, but I suppose some people prefer to put themselves first before Mother Earth.

In the end, we decided to let Caitlyn use the pool once a week. It makes for a lovely decorative piece in the bathroom whenever we’re not using it. And the best part is, the inflatable pool was cheaper than the garbage can! Go figure.

Test run in the baby tub

She likes it!

Graduating to the inflatable pool

Playing on her activity mat

Hanging out in her stroller

Posing with Mommy at the park

3 Month Milestones

Grandpa Lin: Maybe her hair sticks up because it’s so startled by her screams and cries.

 
A topic that almost always arises when people see our baby is her hair. She’s got a mini mo-hawk that I think is quite endearing. Unfortunately, not everyone shares in my opinion, especially my mom. Every time I talk to my mom on the phone, she’ll tell me that Caitlyn’s hair isn’t very proper for a girl and to stop putting it into a mo-hawk. 

That’s all fine and dandy except for the fact that I don’t even do anything to her hair. It just naturally sticks up by itself, which I’m guessing is caused by the two hair whorls she has on the back of her head. For awhile, the wife and her mom were constantly trying to comb it down, but it just kept popping right back up. They’ve finally given up.

It’s almost reminiscent of the cowlick I had as a kid. No matter what I’d do to my hair, the back would always poof up, kind of like Dennis the Menace, and it was nowhere as cool as Caitlyn’s hairdo. Therefore, I finally shaved off all my hair in high school and haven’t really had the urge to grow it back since.

Mini Mo-hawk

What my cowlick looked like

Now that she’s turned 3 months, Caitlyn’s passed a few big milestones. First, she can easily track people with her eyes and smiles a lot. She loves looking at people and things. Unfortunately, that also includes the TV. Especially the TV.

She’s also beginning to have more control over her hands and is able to grab and hold on to things. Third, my precious mobile, which had been largely ignored, has now become a source of enjoyment for her when she lies in the crib.

But the biggest jump for our baby is that she’s starting to roll over onto her stomach. She’s been trying for awhile, and finally succeeded about two weeks ago, much to the dismay of the wife, who now has to constantly check to make sure the baby’s OK. Just another thing to add to her list of things to worry about.

I did some research and found that most babies usually start off by rolling from their stomach to their back around 2-3 months because it’s easier and then from their back to their stomach around 5-6 months.

Our baby hasn’t rolled onto her back yet. During tummy time, she’ll just lie on her stomach and flop her head around. However, put her on her back and she’ll start bucking and kicking and flailing around until she’s got herself turned onto her stomach. Perhaps she didn’t get the memo that states that you roll from your stomach to your back first.

Rolling over

 Playing on her play mat

 Sticking out her tongue

Meal Time

For the past few weeks, Jessie’s been complaining about stomach cramps and a loss of appetite due to anxiety. Now that we have a baby, having a normal meal is out the window. Meal time is divided up into turns. Jessie will eat first while I take care of the baby. Then, we’ll switch so I can get a bite to eat. And then we’ll switch back again so she can finish up. This makes for a very intense, fast-paced setting.

As a person who eats everything extremely quickly, I’m in my environment. But for someone like Jessie, who actually likes to take her time to enjoy a meal, she’s a fish out of water. Being constantly distracted by the baby’s cries and rushing to finish her meal has caused her to develop stomach cramps that make her unable to eat much.

The general term for this is nervous stomach anxiety. I used to have this growing up as a kid. I don’t know why, but for some reason, I’d also get nervous eating at someone else’s house or eating lunch in the school cafeteria. I couldn’t do it. I’d feel sick to my stomach and want to throw up.

Waiting in line to get my lunch was pure torture and even on the days that I actually made it all the way through to purchasing something to eat, I’d just end up throwing it all away. Thankfully, I managed to grow out of it and never had the embarrassing moment of actually throwing up in front of everyone.

This past weekend, we decided to go out for brunch on Sunday. In other words, we decided to go looking for trouble. The second we stepped foot into the restaurant, Caitlyn started up an extremely loud and violent-sounding scream that probably made people think we were beating up our baby.

I decided to take her outside and push her around in the stroller to calm her down, but after about ten minutes, it was apparent that wasn’t working. Finally, I had to hold and bounce her up and down continuously in order for her to stop crying. Jessie, meanwhile, was coming in and out of the restaurant to check up on how we were doing and to take my order.

About 20 minutes and a strained right arm later, it was my turn to go eat and her turn to wheel the baby around. The wife, I noticed hadn’t eaten much of her meal, and as I rushed through mine, I realized just how she felt. My stomach was queasy and I had a slight urge to throw up. It was the school cafeteria all over again.

I was extremely anxious, kept wondering how the baby was doing, and wanted nothing more than to escape and get the heck back to our apartment where our baby’s cries wouldn’t drive anyone crazy but ourselves. 

On the way back home, I told the wife that I didn’t want to go back out again for a long time. But I know that’s not the solution. The need for time and space apart from the baby has become so apparent that Jessie’s been forced to call back the Un-Super Nanny for assistance. I guess any concerns about how our baby will fair in the care of another is overridden by the need for sanity.

Playing with sister Maggie

Who's the cutie pie?!

Snoozing big time

Walking the baby and eating an ice cream cone

 

Happy baby, tired mommy

Wellness check

Oh my gosh!! I've got a follower for my site!! How exciting!! I don't know if this person pushed the join button by accident, and I don't care. I've wrangled in my first disciple and I'm not letting him/her go. Once you've joined, you're in it for life. DaDai, this next post is dedicated to you!

Last Thursday, we went to the doctor’s for Caitlyn’s wellness check and vaccination shots. Her length and head circumference are in the 85^th percentile, but her weight is slightly under the 50^th percentile.

She’s only gained slightly more than a kilogram since she’s been born. If this keeps up, it looks like she’s going to become a tall, skinny, highly intelligent supermodel when she grows up. Not a bad combination.

To help Caitlyn put on a little more mass, we’ve switched to the medium-sized nipple for her bottle. We’ve been thinking that the reason she doesn’t drink as much milk as she could is because sucking on the small-sized nipple was hard work for her and she’d get tired easily, thus giving up quickly.

While the medium-sized nipple has helped make drinking easier for her, it’s also made more milk spill out of her mouth because she can’t keep up with the increased flow. Either way, we’re wasting milk, but at least with the medium-sized nipple, she’s able to drink more, and more importantly, feeding time has been cut down from over an hour to under 30 minutes. That comes out to be about 3 hours of saved time a day, 21 hours for the week. Now that’s a time saver!

Getting checked out by the doctor

Sharing a sweet moment together

Waiting outside the doctor's office

Is it time for my shot yet?

Taking a nice walk in the mountains

The wife with big sister Sally and Jocelyn