July 31, 2012

Swimfest

It’s summertime and it’s hot, so it’s the perfect time to introduce the baby to the wonderful world of swimming.

When I started swimming for the city league swim team in middle school, we were required to wear swimsuit briefs when attending swimming competitions. I still remember the first time I tried it on. I was quite horrified to discover that it was much smaller than my underwear briefs, and it only got worse when I came out and the saleslady said that it was still too big and needed to go a size smaller.

My initial horror turned to delight when I wore it to my next meet. I remember gliding through the water so fast and was so far ahead of everyone else that I actually stopped to look back to make sure there wasn’t a false start, and then cruised to an easy victory.

But while swimsuit briefs might be great for blowing the competition away, they’re not exactly suited for a leisurely day at the beach or pool, unless of course you’re in Europe. I thought I had left swimsuit briefs in the past, so imagine my dismay when I found out that board shorts were not allowed at the pools here in Taiwan. You have a choice between briefs or jammers, neither of which particularly appeal to me.

In a sort of retaliation, I decided to opt for the smallest, flashiest swimsuit brief I could find that didn’t leave much to the imagination in hopes that the staff members would plead for me to put on more conservative board shorts instead. Unfortunately, that never happened.

Now that I’m a father and am responsible for a baby, flaunting my package around in a teeny tiny bathing suit really isn’t appropriate, so I special ordered a full-body competition suit just for this occasion. I’ve always thought these to be pretty cool looking and always wanted to wear one, so while I may never be the next Michael Phelps, at least I can look the part.

The wife doesn’t know how to swim, and even though I’ve tried in the past to teach her, I’ve never had much success getting anything more than a few kicks and strokes out of her before she states that she’s tired and needs a breather. Plus, because she hasn’t gone back down to her pre-pregnancy weight, she refuses to get into a swimsuit. Therefore, taking Caitlyn to the pool and getting her accustomed to the water has become my responsibility.

The first time we went last Friday, I made the mistake of bringing the wife along in case I needed some back-up. Caitlyn just ended up clinging to her while I tried in vain to coax her into the water.

The second time, I went with my dad. I was able to get Caitlyn into the water more easily, and she actually seemed to enjoy it. The only problem was that my dad also had to pay to get in even though he didn’t actually go into the water.

Finally, the third time, I went by myself and voilà
! Caitlyn’s in the water playing around. The only bummer was that no one could video tape the whole scene. Once she's completely comfortable being in the water, we'll be signing her up for swim class.

The only major problem that I can foresee with Caitlyn swimming in the future is the rule that states everyone has to wear a swimming cap. That’s another thing I thought I left behind in the past, but for sanitary reasons, you have to wear a swimming cap. Well, Caitlyn hates anything that touches her head. That includes hats, barrettes, towels, as well as swimming caps.

In my opinion, the pool people ought to be more concerned about her pooping and peeing in the water rather than worrying about a measly old swimming cap. Which reminds me, I once pooped in my cousin's pool because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom when I was a kid. That was awesome.

 

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