Everyone usually fumbles the ball a few times in life. I just happen to do it more often than others. This became apparent Friday night, when after a week of bottling her true feelings in, Jessie let loose and told me how disappointed she was in her birthday and wedding anniversary presents. This in turn led to other complaints that had been simmering for awhile under the surface, and thus, we had a classic 12-round slugfest that left me KO’ed for the rest of the weekend.
It’s not that the wife was expecting anything grand or expensive; she just felt that the scrapbook pages were more so directed at our daughter than at her. Also, this being her birthday and wedding anniversary all rolled into one, the gifts seemed a bit anti-climactic. An opinion that was supported by many of her friends when told what she had gotten for her surprise.
I guess I hadn’t really looked at it from that perspective before. At the time, I took her comments rather personally because of all the time and effort it took me to create them. But in retrospect, I do suppose that those surprises would have been better suited for Caitlyn than the wife. And I suppose it didn’t help that I didn’t buy a real birthday card, but instead, printed one out in front of her face. That was a rather big no-no.
I love the element of surprise and I love giving surprises. However, when you’re married and have a baby, you’re more or less tied down to the home. It’s kind of hard to prepare a surprise without being noticed. That’s one of the reasons I decided to make scrapbook pages in the first place. Because it was something that I could do at work, away from the prying eyes of the wife.
Initially, I wanted to give the wife a nice gift package for some spa and massage treatments along with the scrapbook pages because I knew how tired she was from taking care of the baby. But going out in search of a beauty spa and being discrete about it seemed a bit difficult. Jessie would know immediately that I was up to something. I couldn’t think of a believable enough excuse to leave the house without arousing suspicion. And once I started working on those scrapbook pages, the spa treatments took a backseat, and I soon forgot all about them.
Birthdays and other important celebrations also usually don’t go down the way you envision when you’re married with a baby. For Jessie’s birthday, we took Caitlyn to the doctor to get her shots after I got off of work, bought take-home food, and got a random dessert on the way back home since all birthday cakes were sold out. Not exactly an amazing way to celebrate one of the most important days of the year.
In order for me to try and make up for my missteps, I stole away Sunday morning and went to get a beauty spa gift package with enough credit to last at least 2 years, a real cake, a steak lunch, and an actual card. I knew, of course, that it was too late to try and fix the past, but not trying to fix your mistakes seemed worse, even though I knew the wife would just get more exasperated at my feeble peace offering.
It has always been my belief that your actions, if well-intentioned, are always more important than whether or not the results turn out the way you expect it to. I’m not sure if the wife really bought into my philosophy, but towards the end of Sunday, she did seem to forgive me a bit. If not, we probably wouldn’t have made sweet, sweet lovin’!
It’s not that the wife was expecting anything grand or expensive; she just felt that the scrapbook pages were more so directed at our daughter than at her. Also, this being her birthday and wedding anniversary all rolled into one, the gifts seemed a bit anti-climactic. An opinion that was supported by many of her friends when told what she had gotten for her surprise.
I guess I hadn’t really looked at it from that perspective before. At the time, I took her comments rather personally because of all the time and effort it took me to create them. But in retrospect, I do suppose that those surprises would have been better suited for Caitlyn than the wife. And I suppose it didn’t help that I didn’t buy a real birthday card, but instead, printed one out in front of her face. That was a rather big no-no.
I love the element of surprise and I love giving surprises. However, when you’re married and have a baby, you’re more or less tied down to the home. It’s kind of hard to prepare a surprise without being noticed. That’s one of the reasons I decided to make scrapbook pages in the first place. Because it was something that I could do at work, away from the prying eyes of the wife.
Initially, I wanted to give the wife a nice gift package for some spa and massage treatments along with the scrapbook pages because I knew how tired she was from taking care of the baby. But going out in search of a beauty spa and being discrete about it seemed a bit difficult. Jessie would know immediately that I was up to something. I couldn’t think of a believable enough excuse to leave the house without arousing suspicion. And once I started working on those scrapbook pages, the spa treatments took a backseat, and I soon forgot all about them.
Birthdays and other important celebrations also usually don’t go down the way you envision when you’re married with a baby. For Jessie’s birthday, we took Caitlyn to the doctor to get her shots after I got off of work, bought take-home food, and got a random dessert on the way back home since all birthday cakes were sold out. Not exactly an amazing way to celebrate one of the most important days of the year.
In order for me to try and make up for my missteps, I stole away Sunday morning and went to get a beauty spa gift package with enough credit to last at least 2 years, a real cake, a steak lunch, and an actual card. I knew, of course, that it was too late to try and fix the past, but not trying to fix your mistakes seemed worse, even though I knew the wife would just get more exasperated at my feeble peace offering.
It has always been my belief that your actions, if well-intentioned, are always more important than whether or not the results turn out the way you expect it to. I’m not sure if the wife really bought into my philosophy, but towards the end of Sunday, she did seem to forgive me a bit. If not, we probably wouldn’t have made sweet, sweet lovin’!
Sitting on her Bebe pod
Getting a major head workout
Playing with Caitlyn's feet
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